“I tried so hard to keep my heart and head separate.”
That’s what former Secretary of State Robert McNamara said when speaking about his fateful decisions during the Vietnam War.
But wasn’t that false divide between head and heart the root problem of Vietnam – and perhaps the source of our nation’s disengagement and frustration with our political leaders in general? Isn’t that why voters are so passionately articulating their desire for change in 2008?
We demand of our leaders a steadfast resolve, and surely no elected official requires this strength more than the Commander-in-Chief. We depend on our President to lead us in times of prosperity as well as crisis, and to represent us as a forceful presence on the global stage. Yet we also want to like our leaders, to know that they are human, that they possess beating hearts beneath their tenacious public exteriors.
Yesterday, a woman who has been derided as being too much head showed us her heart, and is paying the price for it today. Senator Clinton has often been criticized as a too-tough woman whose resilient exterior makes her somehow untrustworthy: “Controlling,” “threatening,” “heartless,” “selfish,” and “unwomanly” are just a few of the laundry-list of adjectives used to describe her in national media. So when, after months of grueling schedules and a whirlwind campaign, the Senator actually showed her heart yesterday when talking about what this election meant to her and the future of our country, logic would have you believe that it might have pleased those who couldn’t stop talking about how “heartless” this woman seemed.
Except logic doesn’t apply when it comes to gender in the United States. From The Wall Street Journal to CNN to the blogosphere, headlines immediately sprouted regarding Clinton’s watery eyes—and not in a charitable way. Meanwhile, her democratic opponent John Edwards immediately jumped on the opportunity to imply that, well, maybe this proves Hillary’s not tough enough for the job after all.
If I remember correctly, Rudolph Giuliani, the toughest mayor that ever reigned, showed a dollop of care and softness after 9/11—and it has carried him all the way to a presidential run. That’s the privilege of being male in this country: embracing your “feminine side” becomes a virtue. But when Clinton shows some emotion – albeit on the exhausting campaign trail – Edwards disqualifies her for not being man enough for the job.
As the first viable female candidate for our nation’s highest office, Senator Clinton bears a huge weight—because one woman leader will always have to prove she’s man-enough for the job. But her run – win or lose – has helped to pave the way for other women to enter the political pipeline, and to see themselves as our nation’s future leaders. Hopefully, their power-in-numbers will belie the need to divide heart and head, or to be judged by their displays of emotion or seeming lack-thereof.
But that time is not yet upon us, and we cannot afford any leaders, women or men, who leave parts of themselves off the table. Senators Obama and Edwards look like people who can cry to me, and I find that hopeful. We are seeing a surge in voter participation, and I think their humanity is actually what makes them attractive to voters. But it is a mistake when Edwards turns into “one of the guys”, or when media decries response tinged with emotion from a (woman) candidate. With the challenges that our nation faces, we need authentic leaders, who embrace that leadership with both their heads and hearts.
Great post, Marie! I’d love to get together. Let’s see what we can do.
Polly
I am so tired of women having to live up to a different standard. Women don’t like women who play like the boys when thrown into the areana of the “boys club.” Men thrash women who show emotion.
Not much has changed since I was a law student and an intern in the Bankruptcy Courts of NY. It was 1983. I knew two well known bankruptcy attorneys. While in Chambers one day, I mentioned both to the Judge. He was very complimentary about the male, and vocal about not liking the woman lawyer, particularly her style. I watched her in court, she made the mistake of being assertive and vocal, while polite when she represented her clients.
In the end the Honorable Jane Solomon had the last laugh. Years later she was appointed to o the bench in New York City.
Sadly what I observed and have read regarding the Honorable Senator Hillary Clinton, only proves that we as women have not come as far as we should have, perhaps because of other women as well as men.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Thank you for your vision, your leadership, and The White House Project. We are creating change and seeing the political landscape across our great country change- and it is for the good. Keep the faith.
God Bless- stay well.
Warmly,
Tiffany
Go Run, MN
When I heard that Hillary cried the first thing I thought of the media is going to assault her for something that is a very real emotion. That being said I know if she does not get ahead in the polls no matter what good she has done over the years all memories of that will fade but her tears will not. I think she will suffer for it. To me it’s a shame but the double standard we women have to endure it until someone (and maybe it’s her) breaks the barrier.
Marie,
Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment. I could not agree more. It is very important that we bring our whole selves to the solving of any problem, especially ones that are the magnitude of those facing our country these days. I believe that competency includes a thorough understanding of why one is involved in something as grueling as a presidential race. A belief that we can be a better nation and a better people should characterize this election–that is the kind of change that I care about.
I am glad there is The White House Project, and I am gald that you are there to comment so eloquently. Blessings, Donna
Hillary just won the New Hampshire Democratic primary.. so..enough said! Why is it so difficult for the USA to accept that a woman, with emotions and feelings, can run for political office or hold positions of power? Other countries have women in positions of power similar to the presidency (presidents, prime ministers, religious leaders, CEO’s) and there is no question as to whether they are “man” enough.
We are the ones who can change! We can support Hillary, regardless of what the press says. We can ask a new question of all candidates for every position: Are they WOMAN enough to lead? Women make exceptional leaders, as we all know. We only have to support them and make it happen. Register to vote. Go to the polls. Vote for Hillary!!!!
Here my conclusion…the woman who was real won in New Hampshire. Up to that point she has been following a campaign pattern modeled by men. She broke stride and won hearts…..
Now if voters continue to equate leadership with leadership and not gender, she’ll do just fine.
One other conclusion. Men use “female” to deny the power of the word “woman”.
If we truly want Hillary for the highest office in this country, we had better stop using the word, “female” and embrace the word “woman”. This is a powerful word that women who want women leaders should use consistently.
Mrs. Wilson,
It is a pleasure to receive this email with your blog Hillary did it last night again all the spectations; and I agree with you that Hillary is “man enough to be the President that can bring the change to this country, Last night when she spoke in NH, I remember your own words in NY on the First National Conference in NY for Go run, go girl, go lead. I appreciate a lot your gesture when you choose to sit down in my table and we have a brief conversation about the public affairs and about your own story and your struggle to go ahead and the motivations that you had to support the creation of the White House Project. There I knew how women are more self-confident to lead against the visacious mismaner of the felfish man around the world. I alwyas believe in Hillary as the best option for this country since 1992. I will stand with her till I see her at the White House as the ‘Commander in Chief”. My appreciation to you on the professional trainning, specially because you allow me to attend at not charge.
Isabel Agudelo
973-6846100 ext 6179
Financial Aid Office at Passaic County Community College